Artistic mind

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SEX CHAT #2 WITH MR. LOVE-DESIGNER

Published June 28, 2013 by xgalblog

I should mention that I am bored to only have sex chat with it was not my intention but he turned to that. Doesn’t he like me other ways? There is a line in the chat that I will highlight.. tell me doest it mean he likes me?? How much more can I love him from distance??

June 20   7:03pm

ME:

  • Hei, long time! How are you? What’s up?
  • Don’t you come to your country for mid-summer?

June 21  2:55am

Mr. Love-Designer

  • hi, i’m fine, nothing special. you?
  • i can’t come for Mid-summer, i have work to do
  • maybe later in the summer
  • around august perhaps

June 22  2:56am

ME:

  • I actually thought there is something special, I haven’t heard of you for a long time
  • Yeah, hope to see you when you come…
  • I hate Mid-Summer
  • This is my break up anniversary! !
  • For me nothing either
  • I guess i m getting bored in your country again

3:11am

Mr. Love-Designer

  • understandable, same here
  • that’s why I don’t live there
  • well, I do have some things happening. I have an exhibition opening coming up in Boijmans museum in Rotterdam
  • working for that
  • and a solo exhibition in November in Hamburg
  • work and work, it seems
  • i hope soon I don’t have to do all the work myself
  • well, not all. I have an intern now which is a great help
  • but I’m considering having another one if this phase keeps up

4:00am

ME:

  • (I call his name) it s great to hear all these. I’m very proud of you!
  • Wow you have an intern now! Nice

4:00am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • Yup, helps

 4:01am

 

ME:

  • It’s makes me think I wish I was your intern. I can fantasize you teaching me stuff while I am thinking of something else

4:02am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • What would that something else be?

 4:03am

 

ME:

  • depends on my mood on each day, different elses!

4:05am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • You would spend most of your internship on knees
  • If it was up to me..

4:06am

 

ME:

  • Hehe
  • Maybe!
  • You know what I like about you?

4:07am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • I’m an arrogant ass?

4:07am

 

ME:

  • That you’re really nasty especially in mind and so mean

4:11am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • Mean? In what way?

4:12am

 

ME:

  • Not mean like that… but in a good way. .. you know?

4:12am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • I like you because you want to be more nasty then you allow yourself to be (what does this mean here? Does it mean he really likes me or it is just sexual?)
  • You are on a sexual voyage

4:13am

 

ME:

  • You’re so right !! I do that unconsciously
  • What does that mean?

4:15am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • That you left the harbor but not reached land

4:17am

 

ME:

  • Wow so nice I even like the way it sounds!

4:21am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • I need to sleep now, kiss your tits for me and imagine by cock between them

4:22am

 

ME:

  •  sleep tight. I ll do that 🙂

4:22am

 

Mr. Love-Designer 

  • Next time you have sex with a girl, I want to join you

4:23am

 

ME:

  • You can’t touch the other girl!
  • It’s my rule

4:24am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • What if she touches me?

4:24am

 

ME:

  • Only me. She’ll be all mine
  • Only if I tell her she can touch you

4:24am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • Don’t be so obsessive

4:25am

 

ME:

  • I’m only subsessive for you ! ( I was so high so I misspelled)

4:26am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • I know you like submission
  • Maybe even be tied down to a bed?

4:27am

 

ME:

  • well you should see me the other way too

4:28am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • I want to see you with a girl

4:28am

 

ME:

  • If there is another girl, I won’t be the tied up girl
  • Don’t worry I let you be the boss, cause I like to see you mean
  • I want you to see me with a girl too!

4:30am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • Would you be jealous if I’d let the other girl suck me off?

4:31am

 

ME:

  • I would fight for that
  • Lol

4:31am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • You should

4:31am

 

ME:

  • I will do my best to be better than her
  • To give me all that

4:32am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • There should be enough for both of you

4:33am

 

ME:

  • no please! Give me more.

4:33am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • You can be the last one to explode me
  • Right where you want me to

4:33am

 

ME:

  • Fair enough!
  • Is my mouth good?

4:34am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • Delicious and soft
  • But I need to slap your cheeks with my cock

 4:35am

 

ME:

  • Sure, my pleasure!

4:37am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • How do you like to pressure other girls?
  • Pressure t
  • Pleasure

4:38am

 

ME:

  • I ll share some with her from my own mouth

4:40am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • That sounds so fucking sexy
  • Maybe she could lick it from ass and tits?

4:41am

 

ME:

  • If you tell me earlier enough before you come to your country I ll try to find a girl to be with us!
  • Yeah
  • I like it all

4:43am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • Are you touching yourself?
  • I’m masturbating and thinking of you fighting to get me in your mouth

4:44am

 

ME:

  • Yes I always do!
  • Of course I will
  • But you should be fair

4:46am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • You know how get your share

4:47am

 

ME:

  • Yeah I do my best to be better than her

4:48am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • Just show me your perfect tits and spit on my cock

4:49am

 

ME:

  • O yes …

4:50am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • Take it as deep as you can get
  • Let the other girl watch and learn
  • In looking at the pictures you sent me..

4:55am

 

ME:

  • Was totally thinking about you at those moments
  • They were taken for you

4:56am

 

Mr. Love-Designer

  • Thanks
  • I’m gonna sleep now
  • G’night

4:56am

 

ME:

  • After my cigarette
  • You too

Seen Jun 21

 

It is not like I don’t like talking sexy with him, but I need something more than this too, more affection. I was not even touching myself! Would you recommend anything to do to have him? please, I need help, I love him!!

Weekend #4 Stoned

Published June 28, 2013 by xgalblog

I am too late to write for weekend number 4, I am already in weekend number 5. It was a very dull and lonely weekend. I was high all the time, I had lots of new stories to write here, but I have forgotten them all because they came to my mind when I was high. I have had two more chats and then on Monday, I went to a summer cottage with four middle aged men. I was invited by the bouncer guy I met. I was wrong I think he is not the right person, he is too stubborn, and I think he likes me because I am too high class. I heard from his friends that he had mentioned my middle name which I had explained to him means that I come from a decent family! There I had lots of fun though, although this guy is so rule obeying kind of  person but his friends had lots of pot. I loved it that I was in the center of attention all the time by all men. There was a 22 year guy who was too much into me he kinda touched me when we were lying on the sofa high. I did make up on his face and I used to call him my whore so he had to listen to everything I said. But he left earlier. I had sex with the bouncer. He was circumcised and I like it. So huge penis! And he was fucking strong could lift me up with his finger in my pussy!! I loved that. But I asked him to come over and he refused, although he told me he wants me so badly, and I felt so good. I guess these were just horny talks! I dunno how come I still fall for that kind of talk! I have no interest in him. He is a horrible kisser but he is like Hercules. So strong and I like that. He is not so caring though, he didn’t give me his cap when I was cold. And he didn’t appreciate my body so much. He used to give me more complements.  These people are so weird after a week the other guy that I met in the street asked me out this week but I was in the summer cottage. Why they don’t have passion in their life? They just wanna try a hot brunet that is not fair to me!

I met another guy in that cottage, who was super handsome, gosh like a carved statue, just broke up with his girlfriend, artist in a famous band, he plays accordion. I was so stoned to flirt with him, but he once said loud that I like this girl!!! So I immediately added him on my facebook, and he quickly accepted. I sent him a message but he never replied!!! WHY?  What does it all mean?

 

I tried to be so quick for this weekend as it was too late and I still haven’t gained my absolute soberness back.

Weekend #3 Partying

Published June 18, 2013 by xgalblog

So I haven’t taken my bipolar pills and I am very moody, at the moment in the depression mood but I was very hyper recently. On last Wednesday I asked Mr. Charming out, he said he can only come for an ice cream so we went to a café on the beach, although when I arrived there, some men there started to whistle and ask me over,  he didn’t tell me I looked good! After an hour of bullshitting, I asked him to stay at my place for the night but he told me to never ask him again. After all these sad moments of rejection, I found a 60 Euro parking ticket on my car! DAMN!

 

I decided to not think about him and accepted one my friends from Poland to stay at my place for the weekend, I thought he would be interesting since he is a doctor of philosophy, but damn he was boring. I went out on Thursday night, to see him, on the way a guy hit on me and I gave him my telephone number, I think he is married too !! Damn where are the single good looking men?

 

Meanwhile, my fluffer had a surgery, and he was pissing me off by acting like a child so I didn’t visit him at all. I didn’t find time, I was busy and he was boring. On Thursday it was raining heavily so instead of the bar I gave a ride to my friends to their home and her husband gave me some weed. It was so good I Partied alone till morning.

 

On Friday, A friend of mine was moving to Paris, so we had a farewell party in the city, girls night out, nothing special, just partying. And on Saturday I both got drunk and high and went out, spent some time with my male friends in the street, then my girl arrived, I also met the stranger who I think has a wife outside of a night club. And I gave my number to a bouncer!!!!!!! Do you believe it? I dunno! He is a nice very very good person and had liked me from 2 years ago, he had a date with me on Sunday, I don’t like him anymore, because first maybe I was drunk, I really like him in his suit and not in casual clothing, I am used to date people who have a PhD, or Artists or very rich or important people. BUT he is so much into me, unlike those other categories of people he really likes me, he could be a good boyfriend for me, but what can I do? I can not have any feelings for him!!! Do you think I should continue dating him? Or just play with him? Is there any single boy who would want me for me from those other kind of people? I am tired of being with men who are in a relationship … And Finally no Sex for the weekend 😦

My first time Sex…Rape :(

Published June 10, 2013 by xgalblog

I was a 16 year old virgin, not so innocent, grown up in such a disciplined family, I had found out how to masturbate by rubbing my clitoris to my mattress and in the shower with water. I guess I was a horny girl from the beginning. It is said that brunettes are like that!! Anyway, it would be very troublesome for me if I had lost my virginity. Although I never thought I would obey that rule, but I always thought it would be a romantic time with my boyfriend. One day I was window shopping, dressed in my best outfits and some unprofessional make up to show my young age a bit older. A handsome man, with very green eyes in a fancy car, stopped for me, he offered a ride and I accepted.

He was a medical doctor, so charming and nice to me. He asked me out for a date later and I accepted. We talked on the phone for a couple of times and agreed for a date. He came to pick me up, he took me to his flat which was in part of the city that I didn’t know at all, and it was my first date with an adult man. I thought I should accept everything, His place was so creepy, only one bedroom, a bed inside and no other furniture as a sign of living but some clothes and books, I thought maybe he is a man and it is like this. He played some guitar for me and opened a can of Gin for me. I drank it and I can’t remember so clearly after because I have no idea what was inside the drink, I can only remember that I was numb, so numb that couldn’t hold my arm up. He laid me on the bed, undressed me, He already had his boner, put it hard and deep inside me, I can bitterly remember his voice calling my name and asking me, now you that you are not a virgin anymore, tell me “where is my cock? Yes, it is in your tight new pussy”… I fainted, and fortunately can not remember anything about what happened later.. But as soon as I woke up, I found myself alone in that apartment, hastily I got dressed while crying and bleeding, didn’t even know what happened to me, I went outside of the apartment to look for him.. I couldn’t find him, so I came back to the same apartment, knocked the door many times, and a young couple having the same guitar in their hand opened the door!!! I was shocked I asked for the guy, they said, I was wrong and no such guy existed there! It was the same fucking apartment! I was still feeling dizzy, and I could barely hear them afterward…I was sweating and could hardy breathe, it was such a nightmare I didn’t even know where I was.. I took a taxi to get back home…I still can not remember the neighborhood, when I got home we had a party, everybody was asking me what is wrong with me, I couldn’t talk to anyone, I just locked the door on myself and cried, and changed my bloody underwear.. I called him after that a couple of times, he either didn’t reply or ditched me with stupid excuse, what could I do? That was the time I noticed I am alone in life and cant do shit!!! I didn’t even know if it was sex that he had and I was bleeding for, or something else he did to me! So I just burned inside.. I couldn’t share this to anyone! Not even until today that a decade or more has passed…Not my parents, not my brother, not my friends they all had a stupid prejudice, that let that bastard to easily run away.. I am still tracking him; actually he is a famous doctor now!!!! And I will do a revenge on him as soon as I can!!! He ruined my life a lot after with the consequences… How can some people be that selfish, I was just a child!

Weekend #2 Education

Published June 10, 2013 by xgalblog

This weekend I was still disappointed, I hate myself for thinking about Mr. Charming more than Mr. Love-Designer. So Mr. Charming texts me on Friday morning and tells me he is going to his city to visit his girl and if I want anything from there or not!! Although, I saw the text I didn’t reply, 6 hours later he calls me and asks why I haven’t answered yet, is it a good behavior if he does the same thing to me? I said I was sleeping, didn’t see it, and of course we are different I am a spoiled girl and can do anything but you cant, you should follow my orders. I told him it seems he really likes his girl that he is traveling that far every week to be with her! He ignored my statement and said he is so tired and busy these days, he wanted to me call the night before but he thought it was late. I asked him 3 time whether he missed me or not? He answered all 3 times ‘NO, I just wanted to see how you were!! ” He told me so if you call me next time does it mean you missed me? and I said I will never call you!! He was pissed a little! So I sarcastically told him, your tiredness is because you are thinking about me all the time and can not manage to do your work as well as you should. The interesting part was that he didn’t deny it and said IT people are multiprocessors don’t worry! My reply was, of course I can see it!!!!!

So we said goodbye and I spent the rest of the weekend studying, doing my late assignments, soooo boring still 3 more and my thesis is remained. I HATE studying! I didnt even go to the picnic on the island and all my friends are angry with me!!!

I really hope someone could tell me if he is really into me or he is just a player? He has his girlfriend, he visits her every week, he tells me he likes me, and one time said it would be great if we were together and I said I would never be with you! Why am I playing this pride game??? I wish, I didn’t have to be political and talk freely, but as he is a friend also I don’t want this book to bite me back in the ass later.

Sex Chat with Mr. Love-Designer

Published June 6, 2013 by xgalblog

            Since I was so disappointed with Mr. Charming behavior and rejection, even more after the previous story, I decided to reactivate my Facebook account. I was feeling a bit separated from the world, what the hell everyone only communicates on Facebook nowadays. As much as I didn’t like it, I did it. So as I was on the beach I checked in my place and so many friends joined me and I had a wonderful time, meanwhile when I got back I noticed Mr. Charming has removed me from his facebook, so I called him with rage and shouted and told him how can you even do this?!!!! He said I did it when you were deactivated and his reason was that he thought I am never going back to Facebook, come on is that even possible? If you know please let me know!

Anyhow, I send a message to my ultimate love, Mr. Love-Designer. Here I am sharing my whole conversation with you. Please judge me, comment me, and tell me if things are right or wrong.

Me:                                  She is back here… did you miss me on Facebook?

Mr. Love-Designer: Welcome Back 

                                         I did miss your soft lips on my body..  (After 12 hours I replied)

Me:                                 Oh and imagine that those lips can be anywhere on your body that you want and do many things

                                         Where would please you more?

                                         Btw if you are gonna answer tomorrow, don’t bother! You always are a wet blanket for my mood. 1:25am

Mr. Love-Designer: Hah

                                         Good way to please me to warm me up with kisses

                                        Starting from the top

                                        Neck is perfect area to stay for a while 1:27am

Me:                                Oh yes. . I didn’t know you like it 1:28am

Mr. Love-Designer: As long as the warming up ends when you are on your knees.. 1:28am

Me:                                  And?

                                        I should do all the kissing while I am on my knees? 1:30am

Mr. Love-Designer: No, you need to work your way down there  1:31am

Me:                                  oh yes got it! I can do it wild but soft and smooth 1:32am

Mr. Love-Designer:  Exactly. And you know how to do that 1:32am

Me:                                  What is it down there for me? A reward? 1:32am

Mr. Love-Designer: Yup

                                          Something to fill your pretty mouth 1:34am

Me:                                  Oh yes I like that, but are you gonna take my head in your own control while I am sucking my delicious reward?  1:35am

Mr. Love-Designer:  While you are unwrapping the present you want to see your hands massaging your perfect boobs 1:35am

Me:                                   oh yes I do! !!!! Fuck I like it 1:36am

Mr. Love-Designer:  After a while I might get to excited and grab your head and pull your hair 1:36am

Me:                                  Do you want me to look at you with my eyes while you doing this?

                                         How do you like the look to be? Begging, liking what I am doing or sad? 1:37am 

Mr. Love-Designer:  Yes and also take my balls in your hand and rub then gently

                                          Look at me like you can’t take my whole cock in your mouth 1:38am

Me:                                  I would do that with pleasure, they are the fruit of the tree!

                                         Of course I can’t

                                          Yours is a big one 1:46am

Mr. Love-Designer: You still want to try to get it all in

                                         And I want you to spit on it, rub it gently all the way and try again..1:47am

Me:                                 Oh yes I like doing all that

                                         We actually never tried it when I was on my knees

                                         It’s very comfortable for me too2:06am

Mr. Love-Designer:  Let’s hope we can do that next time we meet 2:08am

Me:                                  Yeah I am actually smoking my cigarette after coming. It was nice.

                                          Good night. 2:09am

Mr. Love-Designer: Good night

Sent from Oude Diemen, Noord-Holland

ٌWeekend #1 Disappointing

Published June 3, 2013 by xgalblog

My recent lover (Mr. Charming) came back from Paris. He said he had brought some champagne for me and asked to visit me for the evening. I had planned my Saturday night with my fluff-er, but as he is only a back up I ditched him. He came over, all dressed up summer, sexy, tanned, mature, with his excellent clone, we planned to have a party, but the others were wet blankets, and so canceled the plan. I wanted to ask my girlfriend over for a threesome and he was into it. So he said he will go to bring some more booze and will come back by his bicycle since he said he doesn’t want to spend the whole night here and couldn’t drive drunk. He left and another lover (Mr. Oldie) that I met in a trip called me, he was enjoying my booze talk and flirtiest talks, I don’t use call waiting so he was calling me finding me busy so he thought I have ditched him. When I finally opened the door for him, first I found out he had come back with his car, then he just grabbed me and told me cancel all your calls I only wanna spend time with you not even a threesome!!!!! I had a butterfly in my stomach, I really wanted to be in his arms, so we drank on my beautiful balcony while I was all the time on his lap, and he took me to my bedroom. I knew that was the time I was waiting for so I changed to one my sexiest lingerie. With my caramel tanned skin, silky black dress short and tight, suiting my silky straight black hair. He started kissing me all over, I didnt let him to go down there, because he had confessed that he is not comfortable with cheating on his woman and he had bought the champagne in the city and from Paris! I didn’t let him to make love with me, it was his punishment! He spent the whole night with me, I couldn’t sleep a minute so we talked till morning.. He was all saying how sexy and hot I am.. That he can not stop thinking about me a minute, even my text messages turns him on.. My smell and my hair on his bed that he tries to keep.. And that if he could he would want to fuck me 50 times a day..

In the morning I asked him to leave cause I wanted to sleep, he was a lil pissed that I didn’t let him do anything to me, although cause I didn’t want him to have blue balls next day I blew him. Later on he didn’t answer my phone call to ask him what I should say for the night! I only call people once and that is it! On Sunday evening there was a BBQ party so I had to pretend that nothing has happened between us among friends. I always get ready for hours and so I m late, when I arrived there he was sitting under the alcove; damn he was so cold to me! I was wearing a white backless dress, I had to cover my boobs as they were fucking bruised, but couldn’t help my arms and thighs.. Everybody was asking what happened to you! Who was the wild guy with you last night, I wish I could say who it was, but he was starring at me so cold.. I said it was my girlfriend.. not a man this time.. I tried to spend my time with 2 friends who have a crush on me.. Then I started to mock my lover’s city and accent (which is actually so charming to me).. You know I am mean I know.. but come on! You know I am coming from a very high class decent family so everyone knows that I sometimes humiliate them if want to, I can be a bitchy brat.. It was so tense between us.. I left earlier, and text him to come over and apologize me.. he didn’t answer.. We fought on the phone till his wife called his other line and I dropped the phone.. He called me an hour later.. I had already passed out and my phone was on silent, he had texted me that he was “really sorry for his behavior and from that moment he won’t do anything that causes those kind of uncomfortable moment and ruin our friendship! And wished me to sleep tight” … what does it mean?!!!!!! He is not going to sleep with me anymore???
Today I woke up hung over, read his message minimum 10 times and decided to call him instead of texting. He didn’t answer and called me back later. I told him don’t act immature we are adults.. he is 6 years older than me! I talked to him kind that it doesn’t matter and I just want him to take responsibility for what he does, I told him my bruises hurt a lot and a word of sympathy wouldn’t kill him , and yes his response was “sorry I was drunk did something, no sympathy for you, anything else???”
I said goodbye nice and gentle, needed to smoke and cry immediately, I could write to him, tell everyone the truth, threaten him, cuss or do anything I used to do with my men but I have grown up, I have had many affairs before. Moreover being in love for the past year with my Mr. Love-Designer taught me a lesson to be less predictive and temperamental. So I am gonna swallow my pain. You never know what happens.. I just know he likes me so much, maybe it was just a reaction to his own feelings.. he has just moved to my city, I was travelling for three months, he had heard about me when he came here in February and seen my professional pictures on magazines and facebook and stuff, so he kept in touch with me on my linkedin all this time, his woman still lives in his ex city, she needs to find a job here first.. When I came back from my vacation he immediately asked me for a date and he didn’t tell me his not single until other friends told me! I feel so shitty, I need him to get back to me, make it up to me and ask me for forgiveness.. I am still thinking about my real love (Mr. Love- Designer) in Amsterdam.. I thought being with Mr. Charming is a good distraction but now I have an intolerant feeling for both of them! It is like, my heart is like an ocean, and it always has enough space for everyone!

GangBang Experience

Published May 31, 2013 by xgalblog

So at the beginning, I just had a hickey on my neck, the next day I noticed another one on the left side of my neck. Having a Gang Bang experience was always one my fantasies. So they all come over me, it got outta control! such a terrifying evening! I never knew it would feel like this!! I still have pain on all parts of my body since 2 days ago!! I am not gonna fantasize it anymore!! I could not handle any of them, as soon as I got rid of one them i found 3 more on my other parts of body!

As it was happening outdoor in a humid farm, my friend was there and witnessed it all.. later he told me that they were all females!!! how could this be possible!? Yes, my friend told me that mosquitoes that suck your blood, are females and they do it to reproduce! So shocking that I had a lesbian mosquito Gang bang Experience …

Second thoughts

Published May 28, 2013 by xgalblog

So i ve been thinking a lot.. what is the reason for all of these.. people call me that i am pleasure oriented, arent they? their pleasure just might be different! why do they look at me like that? My ex boyfriend’s friends told me i am materialistic.. am i? just because i like to spend money? or because they prefer to save their money.. i pay for good stuff.. they were made by efforts, they are designer stuff, why shouldn’t i buy a piece of art?
I feel very lonely that is why i started this blog, hope to find some people who are interested in real me.. tonight my friends invited to play tennis with them, but how can i go there when they cant see my boobs from my top? A friend told me the other day please talk less sexy and more polite because we as married people get offended! fuck! they dont like me no one pushes them to be my friends! My new lover, has gone to Paris, i hope he brings good souvenirs for me 🙂 this time i should be able to not have feelings for him!! I am a Pro.. come on! men are the easiest manipulative creatures for me, but why when my feelings get involved everything is ruined? I really cant find any answer for all these questions.
Did i tell you i live in a host country in far far north? Did i tell you anything about myself at all? that English is not my first language either.. pardon me if you find mistakes in it! I may blog scattered and not comprehensive, but that’s how i am in real life. this is my first time blogging, it feels good, but i am a lazy ass, and not made for writing, but i m doing my best this time!